Aaahhhh.... Thanksgiving

Are you ready for some turkey?!?!?! I certainly am. I know that I've mostly written stories in my past blogs but I thought I'd do something different. Sadly, I don't know what to do differently. Maybe I'll just continue to write until I think of something. I can't wait for Thanksgiving!! I want a home cooked meal and not have to have my ID swiped for it. My family doesn't really do anything exciting but it's still really fun. We'll watch Macy's parade until the food is all ready and then we'll eat. After dessert we play games or just relax. It's really fun. My grandma will probably invite some people from church who don't have family in Phx. She likes having company and nobody should be alone on Tahnksgiving (you thought I was gonna say Christmas didn't you?). Oh, random fact: did you know that desserts spelled backwards is stressed. I thought that really funny. I first realized that when I read it in a comic strip. It was Thanksgiving and this lady ws stressing out about all the desserts she had to make. Her dog and cat were looking at her. Suddenly, the dog turns to the cat and whispers "desserts spelled backwards is stressed". I thought that was pretty interesting. Okay, well I can't think of anythign else to write about. So, that's all folks (think of Prokie Pig when reading that).

Pirate-ness

So, this one I wrote while I was suppose to be writing one of my essays.
It's been four days now and the snow just keeps coming. Our ship has been frozen at port and the captain is eager to set sail again. He has restless legs and dislikes the idea of staying too long in a city that we frequently visit. Too many people know who we truly are and lips loosen after a tasty pint. The captain put us all at risk when he decided to dock here. I feared that I was the only one who sensed something and felt the need to tell the crew but nobody listens to the cabin boy.
I don't particularly enjoy being at port. As the youngest amd smallest, the captain feels that I would be less conspicuous and therefore I am sent on all the errands. of course this involves going out in the snow, a task that I am not very fond of doing. However, there is one small perk to having to run all the errands and that is-.
"Cabin boy!", bellows the captain,"go check onthe ship and sure there's no cracks, for if there is then it'll be your head". These threats aren't so rare to me but I know the captain will be good on his word. I strap on the little leather bags that are supposedly my shoes and take off out the door. I don't have the pleasure in owning a coat and must run to stay warm.
I quickly make it to the ship and rapidly check for cracks. The captain and I both know that cracks aren't likely to be found; he just doesn't trust me and wants me gone while he counts his diminishing treasure.
I hurriedly finish and as I head back, am able to enjoy this errand finally. I turn the corner and look up. There she sits in her window, the most beautiful being in all the earth. Ruby red lips, blond wavy hair, and piercing sapphire eyes. Every time we would land at this port, I would find and just watch. Sadly, I could never do anything since I am associated with pirates and she is the Governor's daughter. I realize that I've dawdled too long. I start to leave when suddenly I'm surrounded by the Royal Navy.
"You are under arrest", someone behind me says. I feel a sharp pain behind my ear and then darkness.

"In the dead of night..."

This was a free write for my english class. She gaves the first sentence and then we had to continue it.
In the dead of night I was hiding under the couch. My older siblings and I had decided to watch a scary movie; unknowest to me, they all planned a very mean trick. I'm not a fan of scary movies so it was easy for them to play this trick.
The movie was about some siblings that stay at home alone. It's almost morning when the youngest finds all the others dead. After the movie, all my siblings ran out of the room; I was starting to get suspicious. Suddenly, noises are sounding all around the house, the same noises that were in the movie. I, not knowing what I was thinking, go look around the house still suspecting my siblings.
In every room one of my siblings is lying in a mutilated way. I'm not really convinced, except maybe the real looking blood, until I come to the last room. There, standing in the middle of the room, was a huge man in a trench coat holding a bloody knife. He comes running towards me. This is why I was hiding under the couch in the dead of night.

My interesting Saturday!!!

Here's how yesterday(Saturday) went for me. I got up at 7 a.m. not knowing what to do. So I went outside and there was this huge dragon that was about to roast this wimpy guy (he was crying). I run up to the dragon and yell "hey, guys don't taste good so you shouldn't eat him. You'll get a stomachache" and the dragon says "there is nothing else and I haven't eaten in a month". Then I tell him that there's a cafeteria right over there. He drops the guy, says thanks and goes to raid the cafe. The guy gets up and is about to say thanks when he spontaneously combusts. As he's rolling on the ground trying to stop the flames I just walk away thinking he should have said thanks before he blew up.

Then I go to the north side of campus and an alien ship lands right on top of the math building. I know that I should be scared but I'm so happy thinking there's no more math class. YAY!!! Then this alien steps out of the ship walks right up to me and says (in klingon which I happen to know) "Take me to the smartest, beautifullest person here" I say "I'm right here". Then the alien picks me and takes me into the ship where the aliens make me queen. It's fun and games until they try to sacrifice me. I pull out my numchucks (bet you can't guess where I was hiding those) and start beating off the aliens. I accidentally push a button and I drop straight down back onto earth.

This would be great if I was dropped in Flagstaff but no I'm in Buttcrack, Wisconsin where everyone thinks I'm an alien. I have to run from the FBI and the people from Area 51. Suddenly, I realize that I'm hungry (haven't had lunch yet) so I decide to use the idea that I'm an alien to my advantage. I went into Wendy's and said "I'm an alien give me a baconator" cause those things are good.

Finally, I make it back to Flagstaff by hoping 4 trains and an airplane (that was fun). When I get back to my dorm room, I remember that I have homework so I go to the computer lab to get it done. As soon as I login to the computer it fries out as do all the other computers. The lab techinicians say "all the computers in the world blew up therefore you don't have to do your homework until we get the problem fixed. Just tell us who your teachers are and we'll write to them telling them what's going on". I couldn't believe it. My luck was with me today. Thinking that I decided to go buy a lottery ticket hoping that I could win. I bought the thing and heard the numbers. Guess wat? I didn't win. That got me pissed so I decided to go to bed. Sadly, before I could go to bed I had to take a shower but there was no hot water. Cause I was so pissed off, I ripped out the wall and did some fancy plumbing (to be a plumber you just gotta show the crack) and got hot water. That put me in a little better of a mood but I was still mad. I wanted to win the lottery.

Realizing that I can't go to bed mad, I stay up and plot my revenge. that's always a better idea than going to bed mad. I decide to burn down the lottery selction place. Doing a tom of research I discover where that building is located. A place called Hickville, Georgia. Hoping 3 boats, a moped, and an airplane. I make it there in time for the next drawing. I knew that I wanted to burn down the building but not the people in it so I wait til midnight. After everyone (including cleaning crew) has left I light up the place. It's very pretty actually. I stand there for half an hour and finally notice that the fire department wasn't coming. That blows. A place that popular should get some media coverage. Depressed, I walk back to Flagstaff and make it in time to go to my classes monday morning (except math of course). I'll probably have another day close to this seeing as how I live close to Route 66.

Excuses

I was bored and decided to think of different excuses for not having my homework done. Some of them are really dumb but funny.
Excuses for not having homework done



1) My imaginary dog was hit by a car and I've been mouring. *wear black when using this one*



2) Every computer that I logged in to would explode.



3) I was busy putting out this person that spontaneously combusted.



4) I thought the end of the world was coming so I was getting ready for it.



5) Aliens e-mailed me and told me to find my protective helmet, I was busy looking for it.



6) Too busy thinking of ways I could kill you (teacher) and get away with it. Did you know there's 20 ways?



7) My brain went on vacation and won't be back til January.



8) Busy trying to figure out how to rule the world.



9) I died then came back to life an hour again, you should be happy I even showed up today.



10) Busy trying to figure out how to drown a fish. Turns out you can't , who knew?



11) The voices told me I didn't have to do the homework.



12) Hold on... *pull out a magic 8 ball, whisper something, turn the ball a few times, and look at it* the ball says that I don't have to answer you.



13) I went with Charlie to candy mountain.



14) I was in a freak bicycle accident and in a coma, just woke up this morning. (Thanks Oscar for this one)



15) My pen died so I had to go to Canada to buy more cause pens are cheaper there.



16) I had amnesia the day you assigned it.



17) I don't remember anything that was said before the frisbee hit me.



18) You were serious about that assignment? *have a surprised look on face*



19) Too busy trying to cast a spell on my pen to do the assignment itself. The spell was great, I blame the pen.



20) Puff the magic dragon needed me to help him find his way back to Honally. ( I might have spelled that wrong).



21) My doctor said no strenuous activity, I believe that includes homework.



22) I was literally sucked into the book I was reading and just barely made it out alive.



23) What? The leprachaun said that he'd take care of it. That liar.



24) Can I give you a better excuse later?



25) My parrot committed suicide by flying into the fan. I'm still cleaning guts off the wall.



26) Too busy rescuing cats that got stuck in trees.



27) Too busy trying to think of a good enough excuse. Sadly I failed, no imagination.